Friday, December 2, 2011

Crossroads

Sometimes we all found ourselves at a crossroad, not knowing the right path to take. Afraid to take the right one, but not wanting to take the wrong one over and over. I look around at these students, paralyzed as I watch them live their normal teenage lives. Living the life that I missed out on. There will power to do good deeds is much stronger then mine, I'm so weak it hurts my heart to think about what might have been, what could have been, and what never will be. I despise what my life has come to. How to fix such a tragedy? Somedays I think its possible to mend the broken pieces, other days I feel as if its impossible, like the wounds have turned to scars that would be much too difficult to get rid of. I believe in time they will fade. Though they will always be there haunting and taunting me. Everything around me is so cold and dead. No light is being brought to me, nothing can make me shine. It's like i'm always walking through a dark fog that grows thicker and thicker everytime I make a bad decision. Decisions that will effect my future drastically. Bad people I can't seem to say goodbye to. It all hurts me more then I show. Is this really a mid-term that is too difficult for me? Or a wake up call? A wake up call that will make me or break me depending upon which path I choose to take from here on out. I'm so used to the pain that I think I may be a little frightened to see the light again. To be vulnerable again, to trust again. But it's also a desire I can't get rid of. I loved you world, why did you turn your back on me?

                                                           *SoulSeekingInnnocence*

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